Tuesday, September 23, 2008

You don’t mess with Zohan (2008)

Who is Zohan?
An Israeli super commando turned hairdresser

Current Alias : Scrappy Coco

Current Nationality : Coco Australian

His Dream
: Fed up of the never-ending Middle East conflict, he just wants to live in peace in New York, where he can enjoy hummus and Fizzy Bubbly, and make every one's hair silky smooth

Vital Statistics : A libido that ensures that he can bang women aged over 70 till they die coming. A well displayed ass which he regularly smacks. Uses it to fish, catch cats and stack dollars.

Key strength : His super bushy crotch. Gyratable endlessly, uses it to scratch records while deejaying, discusses its dimensions at length , rests it on people's shoulders, can withstand frosty fish bites and even taps it twice as a sign of respect.

Weakness : His current love interest a Palestine babe and salon owner Emmanuelle Chiriquí (Dale). Zohan has to save her salon from the loan sharks and ensure that her salon becomes the most popular one in NYC.

Nemesis : The Phantom (John Tuttoro), a Palestine whose illusion that he had killed Zohan is busted by a cabbie played by Rob Schneider (Has a score to settle with Zohan for stealing his goat)

Villain : Real Estate mall mogul, William Buffer and his girl friend with the perfect ass to breast ratio.

Key Secrets : Bangable quotient of Michelle Obama, Laura Bush and Hilary.

: John McEnroe, Chris Rock, Mariah Carey

Biggest Crime : Zohan bangs only women over 70 and super hot Emmanuelle Chiriquí is wasted in tossing glances which leaves Zohan stifffff.

Conclusion : The warring Middle East factions live happily ever after in New York while bringing down the real villain

Bottom Line
: You don’t laugh with Zohan. You waste two hours with Zohan. You wish you could more than mess with Zohan!

PS: The movie has just made over 100 Million $ in US and is considered as one of the better Adam Sandler comedies in recent times. How dare we crib that Race and Singh is King are the two biggest hits of the year in India!

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